As I mentioned previously, I met Will via OKCupid. Since then, I’ve been a big advocate of using online resources to “get out there” (so to speak).
Let’s be frank, though. I’m not your mother. I don’t care about the grandbabies. I just want you to be happy. If you think meeting new people and perhaps starting a new relationship would make you happy, let’s go! If not, that’s fine. See you tomorrow (No worries! I still love you!).
As mentioned previously, I made online dating into a “job” of sorts and devoted time each day to being on the site. I mentioned that this may be a little nerdy. Well, I did something else that may be a little nerdy as well – I had other friends review my profile.
Friend 1: The Witty Wordsmith
My dear, lovely friend Theresa was ever supportive of my online quests. Beyond my love of her diction, Theresa knew me. Anyone can craft a magical (false) profile that will draw the mens like bees to a picnic but that’s not what I was after. I wanted me – polished. I wanted to use the words in my profile to craft the best (honest) picture of who I was and what I was about. Frankly, I have never experienced writer’s block like the kind I had while trying to describe myself to strangers/date-able men. This part – getting started – can be the most daunting. Like all daunting tasks, however, having friends around makes it easier. Pick a close friend (perhaps the one with the stellar vocabulary) and do it to it.
Friend 2: The Man-Friend
Mike, a friend and fellow craft beer aficionado, also took a look at my profile. Besides pointing out a grammatical error (arg!), he commented on the photos I had posted. It’s interesting to get other people’s take on how you look – I know I can be very self-critical. I had recently gotten bangs and decided that I couldn’t post pictures of pre-bangs Helena as that would be way too confusing. Mike convinced me that guys (or at least the guys I was trying to lure) are not that easily thrown off course. Plus, he gave my profile a kind of man-stamp-of-approval.
In addition to their suggestions on how to tweak my profile, having Mike and Theresa’s help was incredibly encouraging. Sometimes, dating (online or “in real life”) needs a dose of encouragement.
ally bean says
I love that you asked for and took the advice of other people so that you’d be seen as polished. I know two married couples who met online and they did the same thing. Positive begets positive. Polished begets polished, eh?
Helena says
I was so nervous at first, and having the support of friends really helped.
Theresa says
I’m honored that I helped, in some small way, with you meeting your lovely boy! (BTW, I helped re-write my guy friend Adam’s MySpace profile, back when that was where people hung out online, and not a week later a girl contacted him. They’re now married and have two babies. Just sayin’.)
Helena says
You helped with wording and confidence, lady! Thanks!
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