Remember Alt? Yes, of course you do. I talk about it all the darn time.
Well, while I was there, I got to hear Gretchen Rubin speak… and she is pretty darn incredible. Her resume is packed with accomplishments (clerking for Sandra Day O’Connor, writing biographies of Winston Churchill and JFK).
It’s more likely, however, that you know her from The Happiness Project (not that you aren’t a Churchill buff, it’s just that harnessing happiness seems to be more on the radar).
Anyway, I’ve owned the book forever but always felt I had to be in a certain frame of mind to read it. Like I had to sit down with a journal and fancy pen to catch any nuggets of wisdom as I slowly worked my way through the book. There would be long pauses for reflection after every chapter. You know, the perfect kind of meditative environment in which I never find myself.
So, I finally just sat down and read it. And loved it. And you should read it too.
Gretchen has a list of Splendid Truths – her fundamental principles of happiness. I decided to make my own list.
Today is a special occasion. Why wait until Thanksgiving to break out the fancy china? Use it tonight.
Always, always upgrade to the sweet potato fries. Word.
Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom. Believe me, I’ve learned this (and relearned this) the hard way. While I don’t exactly live in a bathroom-less desert, it would be nice not to guilt-buy bananas at Starbucks when I’m out and need the loo.
You always have time for what’s important. In younger years, I used to say this snidely to people who said they were too busy for whatever plans I’d proposed. Super-subtle meaning: YOU MUST NOT THINK I’M IMPORTANT! Now, it’s more of a self-commandment (or affirmation when my schedule seems crazy). If it’s important, it’s worth the time. If time is tight, cut things so important stuff fits.
Just take the darn compliment. Don’t rush to return the compliment (“I like your shoes, too!”) or put yourself down (“Really? I think my hair looks like a mess!”) … just smile and say “Thank you.”
Thoughts? What would you add?
renita says
Wonderful. I’ve taken “never pass up a chance to go to the bathroom” and “just take the darn compliment, already” to heart myself.
I have a sort of flip side to “you always have time for what’s important”, which is “don’t feel guilty if it’s not important to you [me].” I need time to myself to just unwind, sleep, read, be with my husband, etc — so I shouldn’t feel guilty about not going to every event that sounds fun, every “Taste of ____”, every family event my mom wants me to drive three hours for.
I do make time for what’s important … and sometimes, what’s important to me is just hanging out at home. 🙂
Helena says
Ooh, I love the rewording/new angle with “don’t feel guilty if it’s not important to you” – perfect for me as I tend to feel guilty when I miss street festivals or whatever, like you were describing.
Vanessa says
Learning to take a compliment is probably one of the best things I’ve ever done. I don’t compliment other people without meaning it, so why would I assume others would be doing that with me? Silly.
Sarah says
One of the best pieces of advice I ever received was from my mentor teacher Mrs. Tolley. She was really a mentor of life. Although I still struggle when people offer to help me, or offer a compliment the lovely, well spoken, endearing, Mrs. Tolley in her soft yet firm voice said “Mrs. Cooley when someone offers to do something nice for you, you simply say thank you.”. Seems so easy doesn’t it?
Sarah says
Oh, and I am going to read the book!!
Jessica @ Faith Permeating Life says
I am totally with you on “Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom.” I struggled with severe anxiety about this growing up because my family would mock me for my small bladder and need to make frequent stops on our road trips, which would (as you might imagine) make the problem even worse. Now that I have a full-time job in an office, I don’t care if people judge me — which probably nobody does. I still put it off sometimes when I’m really engrossed in a project, but I’ve tried to keep myself from doing this after more than one unexpected fire alarm came before I got to the bathroom!
Adriana says
I read that book a year ago, and I still flip it open to refresh my memory every now and again. Wasn’t it lovely? I particularly liked the tip about keeping reminders of our happiest memories front and center.
brianne says
This list is awesome, especially #2 re: sweet potato fries. I’m about halfway through Gretchen’s book I need to make it a priority to finish!
Kerry says
Thoughts – I love those tips! Especially the first one, you have to treat every day like it’s special.
What I’d add – Smile, even when you don’t want to. Science shows that the physical act of smiling can trick your brain into thinking you are happy (or at least happier) and you never know who might really need your smile.
Nancy says
Helena I am a first cousin to Peggy Swyter. We’ve met at Jack Nykiel’s graduation and also your shower. Love your great truths. One of mine is “don’t be to proud to let someone help you”.
As an oldest child it was my responsibility to help my mom, younger sister, younger brother, neighbor, friend, stranger, you get the picture. Peggy can probably attest to this being a Powers thing. Anyway, I never asked for help as I took it as a sign of weakness. Fast forward to the age of 39, I have torn two ligaments in my left ankle and find myself on crutches for 9 weeks. Now I must ask for help. This was difficult for me (gross understatement), it was torture. What I discovered is that all those people I’ve been helping in my life were waiting in the wings to aid, assist, help etc. me. They were thrilled that I asked. Who knew? Just like you friend Sarah mentioned. If someone wants to help or do for you, simply say “thanks”. You’re actually allowing them the privilege.
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